The b*tch is back!

January 6, 2015 The Indecisive Eejit21 Comments

I knew if I asked you lot I would get the advice and help I needed. Thank you so much for all the input. To be honest it was pretty clear from all your comments that Ms May should come back here to her original birth place.

There is much to do and I have set myself quite a task, but thankfully the kind folks at WordPress have already lessened the burden and moved all the posts over for me. I didn’t however ask them to transfer followers, most of you already follow me here, and I felt it unfair to force myself on the others, I’d rather it be their choice.

Over the coming weeks I will start to streamline my categories, May will have her own and perhaps also an information page, so people know that she is fictional. All of her posts will also (assuming both she and I remember) have the banner above, kindly made by Paul from Nugs321. I’m going to see if I can convince him to perhaps make a new one for the main page that features us both. If I get a text message saying “F*ck Off” then he will have passed the test and I will know he actually does read my blog.

There is then of course the question regarding social media, you can, as far as I am aware, only link to one Facebook Page, so again, I may have to make some adjustments so both eejits are in the same place.

The finer points all have to be worked out, but I feel a little better now a decision has been made, here’s hoping I can find the time to put the theory into practice.

Thanks to you lot, the pain in the arse known as May Dupp is coming home. Brace yourselves!

I’ve been thinking…

January 5, 2015 The Indecisive Eejit52 Comments

Too many blogs

Thinking is never a good thing, it usually either signals the end of something, or gives me more work to do. Now you’ll have to bear with me here, because my thoughts are very scattered, which means writing them down will most likely be equally as messy.

I was thinking about my blogs, currently as you know I have two, this one and The Misadventures of May Dupp. Ms Dupp originally started here, however around May last year I decided to give her a place of her own. Creating a second blog is great in theory, however keeping up with writing on both is a bit of a nightmare. Too much work turns something I love from being a hobby to more like a job and I already have one of those.

Second point. We all know that the main thing about writing a blog is the interaction. Without the input and support from our followers we would have pretty much nothing. I’m lucky enough to have amassed 85 followers on May’s blog, most of whom already follow me here. However, on May’s blog I am not able to avail of the same interaction, as I would be reading the same posts twice and commenting as both people, if you catch my drift. It’s unfair of me to expect interaction whilst offering nothing in return, and also if someone new likes a post and I in turn like their blog I have a dilemma as to which account I use to follow them with. See how it gets confusing.

So here is where I need some input from you, my lovely followers who I would trust with my life, virtually of course! Would the simplest solution of all be to bring May and her Misadventures back to this blog and make them both one again, but letting May retain her identity so she can comment on her own posts as well as write them. Or do I leave things as they are and let her retain her own little space of Internet heaven? They don’t call me indecisive for nothing you know!

My fear is that people who follow me there, but not here are missing out on valuable interaction with both myself and you lot, because you are a very entertaining bunch. Secondly, if it all becomes to difficult, will I just throw in the towel like I have been known to do in the past.

What, my little brain boxes, would your advice be?

S’not the New Year I hoped for!

January 3, 2015February 24, 2015 May Dupp15 Comments

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I know you’ve all been waiting patiently to hear about my great misadventures over the New Year period. You were imagining all sorts I’ll bet, the Wicky Digit full to the rafters, firemen actually getting their kit off and Onda grabbing a sneaky snog off Knuckles as the clock struck midnight while I screamed at the top of my voice…..Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz! Wait what!? Yes you heard right, the only sound to escape my lips was most likely a wee snore or two, because I slept through the whole fecking thing.

It all started on Boxing day, and at first I blamed the Brussel sprouts, the usual cause of trouser trumps of such magnitude, but then I remembered I hadn’t actually had any, so there was clearly something more sinister going on. The Usain Bolt sprints for the bathroom followed a short time later along with that age old dilemma, can you reach the sink, when you’re ~~shitting~~ sitting on the toilet, thankfully in my case, yes, yes you can. Blessed relief.

I made it back to the sofa with only minutes to spare, so close to deaths door was I. Me!? A Drama Queen!? Never!

Onda came to visit me and brought tissues and oranges….Terry’s Chocolate Oranges. I tried to point out that not even a Dyson was going to be able to suck Vitamen C out of that bad boy, but it just wasn’t sinking in.

Me: Onda, I’m not long for this world. I think I’ve got Man Flu.

Onda: S’not.

Me: No seriously I think it is, I’m more sick than a big sick thing schooled at the school of sickness.

Onda: S’not (more high pitched this time).

Me: It feckin is!

Onda: No! Snot, wipe your nose you dirty clart, it’s dripping on the carpet.

There was very little sympathy after that, and according to Onda, who it would appear is a bit of a drama queen herself, what came out my nose was worthy of a scene from the Exorcist. As the saying here goes, the snotters were tripping me.

I’d been so looking forward to the New Year, I had every intention of starting it off with a bang, assuming I was able to lure someone back to my humble abode that is, but all I got was a crick in my neck from sleeping at an awkward angle on the sofa all night. I didn’t even realise it was New Years Day until I heard my next door neighbours in the back garden belting out Horse it into ya Cynthia by Farmer Dan, a sure fire sign that the night before has been a resounding success.

So there you have it, I May Dupp was a New Year failure. Let’s hope for a little more excitement in 2015 eh!

Wednesday’s What If? – New Writing Challenge 12/31/2014

January 2, 2015 The Indecisive Eejit5 Comments

Okay, What if Jed posed us a new challenge for the new year…oh wait, he did, anyone up for it?

Okay, What if ?

It’s late on New Year’s Eve when you hear a knock on your door. You go to it and open the door to find an old, weathered looking man standing in front of you. Before you can ask what he needs he begins to talk.

“It’s time for the new but it can fall back. What you choose you should know will be a renewed track”

“I’m sorry. I don’t understand. What can I do for you.” You ask.

“The decision is not one you should go about lightly, you will continue on path both daily and nightly.”

“Okay this is weird. Do you need me to call you a cab or something.”

“Do not think of things as only a joke, when the calendar changes heed the words I spoke”

And with that the old man faded away into nothing. Was it all a dream? A mid-afternoon aberration?

Nope…

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It’s a new year!

January 1, 2015 The Indecisive Eejit18 Comments

New Year

For someone who is not a Christmas lover, this one passed off pretty good. I got a couple of little surprises for which I am really grateful and which will hopefully help me along as I advance into 2015.

I didn’t write yesterday, I did consider it, but in the end I decided I was going to let the fact that it was the start of a new year just pass by quietly. While I am grateful for all the wishes that I will have a happy one, I have no doubt that this year will be more or less like last year, perhaps even worse. That’s not me staring into a cup that is half empty, that’s me being realistic. The start of new year is not going to magically take away the Motherships dementia and all it’s related issues, so I’m pitting myself at the bottom of the happiness scale and hoping to be pleasantly surprised.

It’s not all bad though, there are a few issues I hope to address in the New Year, let’s not call them resolutions because I totally suck at those, lets just call them steps, as in I’ll do them one step at a time.

Here are some of them:

Make more time for myself. If I need to stay somewhere else for a night just to get my head showered then I am going to do it. Caring for someone with mental health issues takes a toal on your own.
No unessential spending. Ok there will most likely be one exception to this. Usually when I get money at Christmas, I use it for the day to day things like groceries etc, this year I decided I would like to use it to actually buy something for myself, and that will most likely be an Xbox One. It is my escape after all :) All day Boxing Day I sat on my hands to stop myself buying one that was in a boxing day sale, because while I have some money I am still a long way off having it all. Other than that, there is an immediate curb on spending and more of an effort to get the finances straight.
No more junk food / crap. I swear to feck there are nights when I feel like a wheelie bin. My mouth is constantly open and crap is being shovelled in on a regular basis. I need to drop some weight, which will help another of my problems, the dreaded knee, which daily lets me know if it’s existence.
Write more regularly, both here and on The Misadventures of May Dupp. It’s not until I sit down to write a post that I realise how much I missed both it and the interaction from you guys.
Listen to more music. This year there were two contenders for favourite song, which were Say Something by A Great Big World and Hunger of the Pine by Alt-J, both of which you can list to on my Music Bubble page. Best album without a shadow of a doubt was This is All Yous by Alt-J.
De clutter – This is the year of getting rid of all the clutter. I started today and was ruthless, if I don’t use it anymore it goes! All the old boxes got broken down for recycling, even the one for my Xbox 360, which I have had for 6 years…..wtf!! If I make enough space then the PS2 is going to be set up, I have decided I need a little Bubble Bobble in my life.

So I think for now that’s enough to be going on with. If I can manage even a few of those then I’ll be happy. If I’m really lucky, I might even have finished the de cluttering before the start of the next New Year.

I don’t know if you noticed or not, (but if you did, pretend you didn’t), that I didn’t get my Cartoon Craziness Challenge drawing done, had I, it would have been a little picture of me with a Ferrero Rocher for a head and a brussel sprout for a body.

There were however two entries and you can take a look at them here:

Mama’s Christmas Cartoon | Mental in the Midwest

Evil Squirrel’s Nest Comic #139 — 12/25/14 | Evil Squirrel’s Nest

Thank you to you both :)

Can I just take a moment to say thank you to each and every one of you who read this blog. You have been with me through all the rough times of 2014 and laughed either with or at me through the happier ones. You’ve lifted me up when I’ve been down and you have entertained and challenged me, I like that.

So all that is left for me to say, is that I hope that 2015 is everything that you hope it will be and more. I look forward to spending it with you all!

May-ry Christmas!

December 25, 2014February 24, 2015 May Dupp2 Comments

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I thought it only polite that I least stop by and say Merry Christmas to you all. I hope however that you don’t mind if I say it very quietly, I did my own version of Scrooge last night and got visited by some Christmas spirits, only mine came in a bottle and manifested into a shot glass.

Dear goodness, I’ve just looked in the mirror and it’s not a pretty sight. I wonder how poor Onda is, last I saw she was boots up under one of the tables in the Wicky Digit and Knuckles was trying to drag her home by her tights.

It’s been a very entertaining year here at the Misadventures of May Dupp and here’s hoping for more shenanigans in 2015! Thank you all for being a part of it.

If you need me, I’ll be over here on the sofa with these two headache tablets and my good friend Mr Hangover.

Have a lovely Christmas one and all :)

Merry Feckin Christmas!

December 24, 2014 The Indecisive Eejit26 Comments

Santa Sprouts

‘I’m sitting here with a glass of mulled wine, there are cinnamon candles burning in the background, the turkey is in the oven and a host of little elves in the kitchen are busy chopping and preparing all the vegetables for tomorrow’s feast, and that my friends is what you call a poo in a pot, as in it’s a crock of shit!

It’s been a very turbulent 3 weeks in the house of the Eejit and to say that I will be glad to see the back of this holiday season is an understatement. There have been tears, tantrums and major bust ups, but still, somehow we managed to make it out the other side in order to celebrate the season of goodwill.

My intention was not to leave you all high and dry for the last couple of weeks, but seriously, I was at the stage where I couldn’t take much more. Dementia and Christmas, do NOT go hand in hand. The final straw was being told that I do nothing, which is a bit fecking rich, considering I do EVERYTHING! I am worn out from it all, and I cannot wait for my one day of freedom.

Thankfully everything is calmer today and I have most things sorted. All the housework’s been done, vegetables are peeled and chopped and the Motherships clothes for her visit to my Sister’s are currently inspecting the inside of the washing machine.

My intentions for over the holidays and the New Year would be to get myself back into a regular blogging habit and to catch up on my reading, I’m currently about two weeks behind, but I make no promises, because my brain is currently mush.

This morning, out of interest, I decided to look back on my blog and see what ~~crap~~ amazing things I had written last year. Imagine my surprise when I read a post I had written on the 27th December in which I expressed my gratitude to the 200 people who had followed me. Who would have thought that less than a year later, I would have amassed just under 30, 000 views and have over 700 followers, I still find it quite unbelievable.

Thank you to you all for sticking with me through 2014, and I hope we shall all remain friends into 2015 and beyond. You friendship and support has been invaluable.

Happy Christmas my Eejits, I hope it is an amazing one.

An Expensive Tiny Update!

December 18, 2014December 18, 2014 The Indecisive Eejit18 Comments

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Writing last night only served to remind me how much I missed both it and the interaction with you eejits. I miss the old days of having free time, it’s one of the many things I intend to address in the New Year. I resolve to try and get myself into a steady writing pattern both here and on Her Ladyship, Mays blog. All things are good in theory however, but real life is never so simple, so all I can do is try.

I’ve also been trying to future proof 2015, to ensure it remains entertaining, sadly this means having to part with cash, which in the same month as Christmas is never a good thing. 12 months line rental to ensure I have broadband for another year, chi-ching that’ll be £170 thanks very much, the Broadband itself, well that’s another £14 a month on top of that. Another 12 months of Xbox Live, cos after all a girl’s gotta game, chi-ching £30. Tv box goes on the blink and needs replaced chi-ching £50. Thank goodness for interest free credit. At the same time though I am pretty much set up for the year ahead, hopefully anyways, I’ll be able to blog, game and watch TV….I might not however be able to eat or feed the Ships, small price to pay right, there is always bread and butter.

(People don’t panic, I promise to always feed the Ships)

Christmas Cartoon Craziness Challenge!

December 16, 2014 The Indecisive Eejit30 Comments

It’s the most wonderful…..yeah whatever! Jingle blah fecking blah Bells! It’s almost Christmas, not, I have to say, my most wonderful time of the year. It costs a fecking fortune, my brussel sprout farts are no longer unique and I get a little stressed out by the whole affair! I am however thankful that the turkey comes already stuffed, having to shove my hand up it’s arse might very well have been the last straw!

I’m looking forward to a few days off more than anything. I already have a list of things I hope to accomplish, the Ships are going to my Sisters on Boxing day so that should give me a little more time. I am looking forward to my one day of not having to worry about anyone else but me…hopefully!

I do like Christmas TV though and all the old films, cold turkey and potato salad sandwiches on Boxing day and eating Ferrer Roche until I think I am going to be sick…..so there are some perks!

Another perk, is the fact that the lovely Mental Mama, thought this might be a good time for a C³ and she’s right, if anyone can fill me full of Christmas Spirit, it’s you lot! So here’s the challenge, we would like you to doodle / draw / finger paint what your idea of Christmas is? So to me it could be a black Santa hat with ‘Bah Humbug’ emblazoned on the front, or for you, a drawing of your best Christmas Baubles…..oo er mrs!

You have from now until Christmas Eve to come up with your best creation, and believe me I know how busy everyone is at this time of the year, but I’m not asking for something Picasso worthy, I’d be more happy with something that made me smile!

More information can be found HERE and this is also where you will find the current entries, assuming we get some!

All you need to do it create a post with your drawing / artwork and then link back to this page, which creates a pingback for myself and Mama!

Simples – Get doodling…..you know you want to!

Oh yeah, and Happy Fecking Christmas!

Heaves a sigh of relief……

December 12, 2014 The Indecisive Eejit8 Comments

Guess what, all the Motherships cards have been written, yep, every last single cotton picken one of them, that’s about 4 hours of my life I am never going to get back. The Mothership is not happy that I did them when she was not there, but I started them on Tuesday and only got two done, so while she was out visiting a friend on Wednesday night I got stuck in and wrote them all. Even the Fathership agreed that there was going to be a mini meltdown no matter which method I chose, so advised me to opt for the less stressful one. I’m glad they are done, but there is no doubt I will have missed someone, the cards after all are not mine so how can I be expected to know everyone.

Things for Ho fecking Ho season are slowly taking shape, I think most things have now been bought, but I still need to write my own cards and get everything wrapped. Getting out to buy bits and bobs is proving problematic, so I have made good use of Ebay, and also purchased some things from the Not on the Highstreet site. If money was no object, I could spend sooo much money on that site, but it is, so I went in and out in stealth mode only picking up what I needed.

You might have noticed as well that I am again a little behind in my reading, this time however it is not entirely my fault. My tablet, a 2002 Nexus 7 decided to download the latest update for Android, code name: Lollipop and it has rendered my tablet pretty much unusable. Googling it, I can see that I am not the only person having problems, so here’s hoping there will be a fix soon! So until then, there is no more reading until the weekend. If however you’re a techincal wizard and know a fix, feel free to let me know!

It’s short and sweet tonight I’m afraid, it’s bedtime, and I need all the beauty sleep can get before my night out with my two of besties tomorrow.

Till next time eejits :)