He was gone, but never forgotten, and now he’s back with the re branded Cosmic Musicology Test! I mean what’s not to love, good tunes and wacky predictions, where else would you get it!! Welcome back Steve :)
Here’s a reminder how it works:
Each week Steve will post 3 new questions so…
(1) Go to the music player of your choice and put it on shuffle
(2) Say the questions aloud and press play
(3) Use the song title as your answers
(4) NO CHEATING
Title your post “Cosmic Musicology Test – …” and link back to this week’s page.
Post your response in the comment section of that week’s page.
Have a look at the archives or click on “Cosmic Musicology” in the category cloud on this page to see all previous weeks.
Any suggestions for future questions welcomed!
For more information, to submit ideas for future questions or just general feedback go to Cosmic Musicology Test.
I Know I Can – Self Esteem by The Offspring – F@&k! Of all the answers there are in the world, this new test would have to pick that! Self esteem is one of the things I don’t have in abundance and at the age I am now I had pretty much given up hope of ever having any! Perhaps my new job and no longer dressing like a tomboy are the things that are going to define me!
I Know I Can’t – The Bones of You by Elbow – I know I can’t jump the bones of you until I get some self esteem perhaps? I reside in a vicious circle! :)
I Know I Might Be Able To? – Nightmares on Wax – Les Nuits – Steve, you broke the quiz, I’m speechless and we all know that’s a first for this challenge. Ok here we go, I want to go to Madame Tussauds the Wax Museum, I’ve said it for a while. When I go I’ll take my low self esteem while dressed in my new girl clothes and try to jump the bones of the waxwork of Orlando Bloom dressed as Legolas from Lord of the Rings, probably getting arrested in the process. Now if that doesn’t give you nightmares nothing will!
It’s hard to believe we are on Week 3 of our challenge already. Mama and I cannot thank you enough for joining in and making this so much fun for us all.
That said, we do still need some feedback on how you feel we are doing so far and ideas for themes you would like to see in the coming weeks, your suggestions are always welcome. If you have spare time, please head on over to Mama’s CCC page here and fill in the little form.
What does this week hold for us I hear you ask, and that is indeed a good question, and one that my good friend Here There Be Spiders e-mailed to me less than an hour ago. To be fair it didn’t take Mama and I long to come up with this weeks theme, Mama suggested it, I liked it, added a tweak and here it is, this weeks theme is Superhero. Now before you all panic, let me expand on that just a little, it can be your favourite Superhero or fictional character, it could also be who you would be as a Superhero. Remember there are no hard and fast rules, it’s your interpretation and it’s also just for fun!!
You have until Sunday to complete your masterpieces. Remember to add a pingback to this weeks Challenge, i.e. this post!
For further information you can check out the Cartoon Craziness Challenge page from the top links.
Looking forward to seeing what you can all come up with!
The final list of last weeks amazing entries for the Self Portrait Challenge!
How are you? Can I trust you? I am sick and rich and I want you to help me distribute my funds to charity organizations,
Please reply if you can help me distribute my funds and I am willing to give 20% of 38.5MILLION for your time.
Waiting for your urgent response.
Regards
Mrs Randa Ahmed
The above is yet another fine example of the unrelenting spam mail that Outlook thankfully filters into a ‘We shall take care of this shit for you’ folder. They seamlessly sort good from evil, shielding me from the worst that the world of the Internet has to offer.
My hatred of ‘Spam’ is not a new thing, in fact it was one of my first posts when I started this blog, although back then, nobody knew who I was. Nowadays people still don’t really know, but thankfully they are kind enough to humour me! You can read it HERE if you’re bored.
Occasionally when I see the numbers rise in my junk folder, I will have a quick rummage to make sure nothing of note has slipped through the net. Wading through the offers of Viagra, Penis Englargment Brochures and Free online sex whilst entertaining, is a period of time spent that I can never reclaim. I particularly love the ones similar to the above, that promise me a share of their fortune for a little assistance, which is usually in the form of money, only you’re not told that at the time.
Another pet hate would have to be ‘Cold Callers’, so incensed was I, that I previously wrote about them as well.
My Mother and Father receive an awful lot of cold calls. I have a different telephone line, so I probably do as well, I just never check it.
I used to feel guilty and tell myself they were only doing their job, and what a shitty job it must be. Well not anymore. Cold callers beware, I hate you with a passion and I will make the 60 seconds you spend on the phone with me as tortuous as I can.
Cold Caller (hereafter referred to as Ahole): Good afternoon is that (insert Motherships name)
Me: No, it’s her daughter.
Ahole: Ah good afternoon Madam, I wish to advise you that your computer has been infected with a virus.
Me: No it hasn’t.
Ahole: Yes Maam is has.
Me: No! It really hasn’t.
Ahole: How do you know?
Me: There is no computer.
Ahole: There is a computer.
Me: No! There really isn’t.
Ahole: Are you lying to me?
Me: (laughing) No I am not lying to you.
Ahole: Do you find this funny, you are laughing so you must be lying to me.
Me (getting irritated): You rang up and asked to speak to (insert motherships name) correct?
Ahole: Correct
Me: Well then I am not lying, in fact I am laughing because you are accusing me of being a liar when out of the two of us, I am the only one that clearly knows that my mother does not, nor never has owned a computer. But thanks for your time.
….dial tone!
To be fair, being the worrier that I am, I did run straight up the stairs to make sure my computerwas in fact still working! Surprise surprise it was!
There was another call a while back too, where a gentleman tried to sell me a mobile telephone. The conversation went on for a good ten minutes with me telling him I did not want a new mobile phone and him telling me that I really needed a new telephone. Looking back I have no idea why I didn’t just hang up, instead of standing there, my rage boiling like a kettle. After telling him for the gazillionth time that I did not want the phone, he replied, “Well I’m going to send you the bloody phone anyway” and hung up. WTF!!
Cold callers learn a lesson – I might be a soft touch, who does not say no very often, but believe me, when I say it I mean it!
Dear Mrs Ahmed,
I would ask if I could call you Randa, but I doubt that is even your name.
More likely it is one you have stolen borrowed from some unsuspecting lady who has no idea that she is doing the rounds of the Internet.
But I digress, back to your e-mail, I’m good thank you for asking. With regards to your question of can you trust me, that’s unlikely considering you do not even know me, are you that stupid that you go around offering a 20% share of your fortune to complete strangers. I have 500,000 in Grand Theft Auto Dollars and not even I’m that stupid!
Have you ever considered, what with you being so sick and rich, that you could hire yourself a Secretary to help you distribute your bullshit funds. Failing that, there are lots of very worthy Charities who would offer you help themselves for a sizeable whack of your fortune.
Now I don’t want to seem ungrateful, but to be honest I would rather you just gave the 20% you were going to give me to Charity, while I give you….sweet feck all.
I’d be happy to provide you a list of where I would like my money to go, if you would like to converse again, this has after all been such good fun!
It’s almost the end of the week, which means you only have one day left to submit your pictures for the weirdness and wackiness that is ‘The Cartoon Craziness Challenge’.
Mental Mama and I have both created pages on our blogs dedicated to the challenge as we each have our own sets of followers, although some are shared.
My page currently has information about the challenge and the information for this weeks along with entries so far. Mama’s is pretty much the same, however for this week and the purposes of this post, hers is WAY more important than mine.
She’s devised a great little feedback form, because while we know you are enjoying things so far, we would still value your input with regard to future challenges etc. If you’ve liked the idea, but not yet been brave enough to join us, then please let us know what you would like to see that might just make you change your mind.
You can find Mental Mama’s page HERE and we would be really grateful if you could spare us just 5 minutes of your time to let us know your thoughts.
There have been some amazing entires this week, and in case you are to lazy to go searching for the original post, (hence the reason why they are now on the page), here is a list of the entries so far:
And so it continues, the Wednesday Weirdness created by none other than Mental Mama herself. If you’re unsure what it’s all about, you can follow this LINK! But be afraid, be very afraid!
I’m actually beginning to think that I am not as weird as I first thought as I am having a tough time answering these questions. That said, I probably am weird, but have convinced myself that my quirks are both normal and endearing.
This weeks question asks:
Weirdest Thing You Do To Relax
Thats a bit of a weird question to ask me really, because I suffer from anxiety and also have a healthy worrying habit to contend with, so I don’t feel like I ever relax. There is always something spinning in my head.
On days when the stress all gets a little too much for me, I find the only way to release the tension is to go on a rampage and leave a trail of destruction in my wake! Doing this in real life would most certainly lead to a spell of imprisonment and shoot my anxiety levels through the roof, so I had to find another avenue through which to vent, and unsurprisingly that was GTA V!
Now I know to a lot of you this will not seem so weird, I am sure a lot of people vent theirs frustrations via gaming, but seriously, it’s the wackiest thing I could come up with.
How did you know it was me?
Owing to the fact my disguise was so good I figured they would never realise it was me who robbed the convenience store, or stole the cars! Then I realised I was still ginger, WTF, back to the drawing board!
Wait, are those my knickers?
My second attempt was a little more successful, however I seemed to attract the wrong kind of men.
Starsky and Hutch eat your heart out!
My third and final attempt was totally successful! No one in their right minds was ever going to recognize me dressed as a girl, high heels and all! After many attempts I was finally able to master the Starsky and Hutch slide without showing my Knickers!! Sometimes though, not even gaming is enough to help you relax. On those days, well there is nothing else for it but to revert to the old fashioned method of sitting on the toilet and having a serious think about where your life is going!!
I didn’t really think this through did I. I never gave any consideration to the fact that drawing a subject might not actually be as easy as it first appears. Damn you Mental Mama, you made this a hard one!
So here is my entry for this weeks Cartoon Craziness Challenge, the theme of which is Self Portrait!
There are two of me, the one in T shirt and jeans is pre job change, and the one which is a tiny bit more lady like is after job change. Neither of them paint me in a particularly fantastic light, so if I can do it, then there is no excuse for the rest of you!!
It’s been such great fun since we started this, I know I have enjoyed it immensely and others have told me likewise. We’d love for everyone to join in regardless of ability, because we work on the basis of ‘the more the merrier’! You can find this weeks challenge and all the relevant information by clicking HERE!
I think a few people are having issues with Ping Backs just now, so if you find one does not work, then just send the info via a comment.
When I saw the description, it was the lying ill and helpless bit that I focused on, you see I have not been here for a while because I myself was in that situation. Something terrible happened. I broke a nail!
Now I don’t expect guys to understand the importance of having beautifully manicured digits, but ladies, come on, you get it, right?! It’s like walking out of the house with your skirt stuck in your knickers, mor-ti-fying!!
Owing to the fact that it happened on a Saturday night there was not a lot I could do until the Monday. I phoned into work sick, and unable to think of another excuse I used RSI or Repetitive Strain Injury as it’s also known. Well I mean I wasn’t really telling any lies, because my hand was in agony as a result of the furious filing required to make my poor nail look somewhat decent.
My next call brought nothing but more pain. I had completely forgotten that Monday was my beauticians day off, which left me speaking to Marina, the bitch of the brows. After the previous incident with her and the leggings, there was just no way I was going to sit down and let her work on any part of me. So I asked if there was any chance of an emergency appointment on the Tuesday.
Marina: Broken a nail or something? (said in an extremely sarcastic tone)
Me: I’ll break your face if you don’t put me in the diary for tomorrow (smiling sweetly, even though she couldn’t see me).
Appointment made, it was then back onto the phone with work. Peppering ‘ouch’ throughout the conversation had the desired effect of gaining me another day off, however I was reminded of a meeting I was to attend that afternoon. That’s why I hate Mondays! Horrified at the fact I might have to leave the house in such a state, or worse still attend a meeting in the middle of summer wearing gloves, I started to get a little flustered. My boss, who I have to say is rather good at picking up on my anxiety suggested it might be possible to complete the meeting via conference call, or Skype. Without thinking things through, I readily accepted, I was just glad I did not have to actually go into work.
I spent the rest of the day tidying up a little, I certainly didn’t want my big boss seeing the mess that had accumulated over the weekend, and could not be tidied owing to the broken nail!
I hate waiting for a Skype call, it means you have to walk everywhere with the required device at a short enough distance to ensure the call is not missed. At about 2 minutes to 3pm, the time allocated for the call, my lunch time Tuna sandwich decided to make a surprise reappearance, typical right! But it was better to pay a visit to the loo than have someone hear the gurgling and rumbling of my poor stomach.
Trying to keep myself calm I left the tablet on the dresser and headed for the toilet. I had only just sat myself down, when the bloody thing started to ring. FFS, I’ve heard of getting caught with your pants down, but this was ridiculous! Imagine a rabbit caught in headlights, hovering over a toilet…that was me!
I cannot stress how important this meeting was, and how vital it was that I make some kind of appearance. I certainly did not envisage being naked from the waist down, and was beginning to realise that I might have been safer just going into work.
The device continued to ring and was in the process of vibrating itself off the edge of the dresser onto the the tiled floor below. Holding onto my knickers which were at this point round my ankles I made an awkward dive and somehow managed to catch the kamikaze tablet mid fall.
Me: Oh thank feck!
The Big Boss: Good afternoon Miss Dupp, have we called at an inconvenient time, I hear you are a little indisposed.
Oh balls, balls, balls, I’d only gone and answered the call at the critical point of rescue.
Me: More than you know Sir, more than you know.
The Big Boss: Shall we begin.
My mind was going ten to the dozen with the statement ‘ah feck’ seemingly stuck on repeat. What the hell was I going to do. Here I was back on the toilet, naked from the waist down, trying to hold a tablet at a modest distance, with a broken nail and alleged repetitive strain injury. W T absolute F!!
Me: Ah Sir, I might need a few moments just to compose myself and get organised.
The Big Boss: (there was most certainly laughter in the background) Yes Miss Dupp, I think you might indeed need a few moments. I certainly hope however that you will not ‘pee’ long, umm forgive me, I do of course mean be long. (at this point hysterical laughter could be heard from the Head office of the Captain Cosmetic Company).
I finished the meeting on the toilet and I also learned a valuable lesson, find a beautician who opens on a Sunday!
Mental Mama and I cannot thank you enough, because it’s been so much fun this week seeing all your entries! Thank you for taking part and putting your own spin on how a ‘Cat in a Hat’ should look.
Please don’t worry about not feeling like your drawing is good enough, it’s all about joining in and making others smile! (Yes Karen, that means you ;P )
We’ve decided to have a trial run of making this a regular feature, so the theme for this week, courtesy of Madame Mental herself, is ‘Self Portrait’. How would you look as a cartoon or a drawing, now is your chance to show us all.
This weeks challenge will run from today until next Saturday, so no excuses, you have plenty of time. New challenges will be issued on either a Sunday or a Monday, I’ll try to keep it to a Sunday if I can.
So get drawing and good luck :)
If you missed last week and would like to see all the entries for the ‘Cat in a Hat’ please click on the link, the entries are listed at the bottom. If I have missed anyone, let me know, I didn’t receive pingbacks for some :)
If you have entered the challenge, but do not see your name listed, I have either not received / or missed a pingback. Please let me know so I can add you :)
This was the week that was, and I am rather glad it’s over. I have a few bits and bobs to share with you today, so decided to do so in the form of Breaking Wind News, hosted by your current affairs correspondent, yours truly, The Indecisive Eejit!
The New Job
I managed to get through my first day on my own relatively unscathed. I have no doubt I take longer to do things than my counterpart would have, but I am on a bit of a steep learning curve, and have been hit with a few things that left me a little stumped. I’ll get there in the end, I have a thirst for knowledge regarding things I do not know, and I need to learn to go easy on myself, I can’t expect to know everything in a couple of days.
The Visitors
It’s actually been good having my Aunt here as she has managed to keep my Mum on an even keel, meaning that for the two weeks I was training I only had the stress of work to deal with. I am however a little out of my routine and feel a bit all over the place, but I have a couple of days off due to the 12th July holidays, to regroup and catch up on things I have missed.
Cat Naps
I’m think I am getting to the age where I will soon start falling asleep in front of the TV when all the chores are done. I really wanted to write last night, but I could not keep my eyes open. I hate going to bed early on a Friday night, I tend to fall out with myself, due to the fact that it’s the start of the weekend and I conk out before 11pm!
Cartoon Craziness Challenge
This started out as a joke between myself and Mental Mama. I challenged her to do a couple of drawings and she accepted. After a few comments we decided to throw it open to the wider blog community. I have been amazed by the responses, and it seems we do indeed have a few budding Picasso’s in out midst. Please feel free to join in, there is no need to worry about your level of skill, it’s all in good fun and I have really enjoyed seeing all the entries this week.
If you would like to have a look and perhaps join in, you can find my original post HERE. There are also links at the bottom to all the entries so far, check them out, they are truly awesome.
I’ve decided I will make this a regular feature and my favourite Mental Mama (MM) has already picked the theme for next week. I’m undecided I might issue it on either a Sunday or Monday, that is to be confirmed.
MM designed a banner and I expanded on it just a little, so from now on all posts for the Cartoon Craziness Challenge will be under the following banner. I hope you like it :)
Something that deserves a mention!
Every now and again I come across a new blog that I like. When I was starting out, I was glad of the help I received from others. That said I don’t think this blog will have any problems gathering followers as it’s really funny, and if I know you lot like I think I do, then you will as well, so I decided to share.
Iggy the Wonder Schnauzer. Rescue beast. Hobbies include chewing and shrieking. Accomplishments include taking over So Many Feebs before getting his own blog, and sometimes sitting on command. Objectives include smelling every single person on Earth.
Go introduce yourself and say hi to the very witty and funny Iggy, you will not be disappointed :)
I like sometimes how I just happen across blogs, however thank you also to all of my new followers. You widen my world when I would otherwise not have been aware of your existence!
It’s the day after hump day, and also the second week of the 7 weeks of weird challenge. I’m a day late, but as someone rather intelligent once said, ‘better late than never’. Mental Mama, please forgive me, I will be on time next week, honest!!
Weirdest thing about you that other people don’t usually know.
I did look at this question last night and I thought long and hard about it, my brain even hurt a little. The conclusion I came to, well I couldn’t actually think of anything weird about me that people don’t already know, it just seems to be universally accepted that I am a little off kilter sometimes.
So here instead are five weird facts about me that I am sure someone out there does not know:
I don’t take Sugar in tea or coffee – This seems to amaze people. They assume, albeit wrongly, that because I am on the slightly larger scale of the spectrum that I must have about 5 spoonfuls of the sweet stuff per cup. My answer of ‘I don’t take sugar thanks’, was always met with a ‘Really?!’. I used to answer with ‘Yes, I’m sweet enough’ but these days it’s ‘yes, because clearly I am fat enough!’
My Favourite Film is a Cartoon – I don’t mean a Disney or Pixar cartoon. I mean a cartoon of CGI quality born from a Video game. Final Fantasy: Advent Children, is my most watched film ever, with The Lord of the Rings Trilogy coming in a close second.
I’m addicted to Stationary – I LOVE stationary, like I mean, I really LOVE stationary. I have lost count of how many notebooks and pens are knocking about my abode, but you can rest assured that only a few will have any writing in them.
My grammar is terrible!! – But you’ll know that anyway if you read my blog.
I’m a virgin – Virgin on the ridiculous that is! (I just threw that one in to see if you were still awake!)
So there you have it, I might be weird, but it feels wonderful! :)
If you would like to join in with Mental Mama’s Challenge, please click HERE!
This was the week that was, and I am rather glad it’s over. I have a few bits and bobs to share with you today, so decided to do so in the form of Breaking 
The Indecisive Eejit 