Tomorrow is a new day

Image from My Status 360

It’s probably a bad idea to write a blog post when you’re cross, and I am cross today. Its been another fun filled day in the office and I’ve completely fallen out with myself. About 45 minutes after going in, I wanted to turn on my heel and go back out, but I didn’t have the balls.

It’s fitting I suppose that I should feel like this, because I’ve finally stopped wondering what I am going to do with my blog. After much pondering, humming and haaahing I’ve decided I’m going to do nothing. Nothing drastic anyway.

This blog is important for me, especially on days like today where I need to stop, sit down and have a serious fucking think about where my life is going.

You see if it wasn’t for this space and it’s blank pages, I probably wouldn’t talk about the veritable storm that goes on between my ears. Instead I’d dwell, ponder and make mountains out of molehills. More so than I do normally.

I’m not the same person I was four years ago when I started this blog and it’s unlikely that I ever will be again, so I need to stop pretending to be someone I am not and embrace who I am becoming instead.

In order to do that I need to be able to write everything and about all parts of me. When I started blogging and chose to be anonymous, things were a lot easier, but when people from real life started to find out my words became stifled. So much so that despite the fact that my mind was awash with ideas, many posts remained in my head unwritten.

In reality I like to think that sometimes I can be funny, but I am hounded by anxiety and I have no doubt that often times depression nips at my heels. So I suppose in essence that means there are two sides to me, on one hand we have the public persona and on the other we have the private one. Although both are very different, when they are put together they make up the person I am.

I need and want to be able to express myself on this blog, and going forward that is something I am going to try to do. I don’t need anyone to worry about me. I find writing extremely therapeutic, it helps me to put things into perspective and sort them out. I don’t write for sympathy and nor do I want sympathy. I’m not the only person in the world with problems and this wonderful community proves that. We work and we support each other and for me that is the real beauty behind blogging.

So, you’re stuck with me for a while longer. I’ve decided to take you on my journey of discovery. It’s all about finding out who I am, what’s going on in that wonky top box of mine and how I sort it out.

Some days there will be tears and some days there will be laughter, but that’s all part of life isn’t it, we have to take the good with the bad.

Thank you so much for being here for the last however many years, months or days you have followed, I have no doubt I have received more from this community than I have given and I feel truly blessed to be a part of it.

To celebrate and as a present to myself, I finally mapped my domain name, I doubt you will have noticed, but it’s just something small that makes things a little more permanent for me.

Also, excluding social media followers, one of my goals was always to reach 1000 followers on WordPress itself. At the time of writing this post there are 998. I’ve decided that’s good enough because in life I am never really quite where I want to be, but it doesn’t stop me trying anyway.

Just over four years ago I had nothing, just some words on a page and no followers. Now I am a part of something I love, and I hope that continues for a long time.

P.s I’m not cross any more :)

48 thoughts on “Tomorrow is a new day

  1. Glad today’s therapy worked for you. I think we all have a public and private persona, I know I do. So great move forward Juls, I look forward to reading more about your top box…

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  2. ❤ you, chica. With all that is going on with me and then the world, I wonder if I should write again…so I am glad you are continuing and found your place with it. Also very glad you are not cross anymore!

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    • I wish you would start again, I loved reading what you had to say :)
      If I’m in a funk or pissed off and I write about it, usually by the end of the post I’m over it. I hate people thinking I’m looking for sympathy or worrying about me because once the post is done I’m usually better lol

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  3. Your authenticity and courage are things I have come to love from you so I’m pleased we’re to be companions on this sometimes crappy sometimes fabulous journey from here to wherever the hell it is we’re headed. Love and hugs Linda 😊

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  4. “Some days there will be tears and some days there will be laughter, but that’s all part of life isn’t it, we have to take the good with the bad.” 100% There’s a quote that says something along the lines of, “You can’t be happy unless you’re unhappy sometimes. Because we experience both, we’re able to appreciate the happy moments or days that much more. Glad you’re sticking around, and congrats on the 998!

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  5. Glad you’ve decided to stick around 😉
    If it’s any comfort, I sometimes struggle with whether or not to write something because “people” might find it and know. Then I remember that as long as everything I write is true and honest, their feelings about what I write are their own to manage.
    Plus, you know… I change names. Just in case. You’d be amazed how many people don’t recognize their own behavior if you slap another name on it.

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  6. Glad that you’re feeling better after post-writing recovery – helps relieve the stress and tension. See? it works its own magic in its own way 😀
    Sorry you had a crappy day, but glad that, at the end, you could pull yourself together while breaking it all down, and come out of it feeling less shattered, scared, angry and pissed off.
    As for ALL parts of you? TOTALLY LOVEABLE – just as you are – so, yup, sitting here – it’s a long haul kind of thing ….
    (((((((((((Jules))))))))
    and now I bid you g’d bye – hand pain beyond mental 😛

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    • Aww thanks, you’re another one who always knows what to say to soothe my soul.
      I might not think I’m the best at writing, and I might struggle sometimes with what to say, but there is no doubting it does help.
      It just means some days here may be darker than others and not everyone may understand.
      I know you will, so I’m relying on you to deliver a good boot up the ass when it’s required lol

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      • boot up the ass, eh? only when absolutely a dead-end meets the line necessity …. cause you’re allowed to have darker days, bitchy days, cranky days …. and if you feel like writing about it? why the hell not ….. besides, I had no idea you were up for sainthood 😝

        lots of hugs (((((((((Eejit friend))))))))))))

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  7. You always seem to echo what I’m feeling in the deep dark let’s-ignore-this-non-positive part of my brain. I hope this blog continues to be a haven of blank pages waiting for your thoughts to wake them up! I appreciate what you share and know you aren’t alone! (Also super Jelly, hope you reach 1,000 soon!!)

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    • I did reach the 1000 in the same day, nut unlike others it’s taken me fours years. Although with social media I had more, I just wanted to see if I could do the WordPress one. It will happen, so don’t worry ;)
      Your comment touched on a good point. I feel so much better when someone says they can relate, because often I feel that I’m alone in the way I think or process things, so it’s refreshing to know I’m not.

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    • It is, it’s something we both need to do more of. I’m going to try to write what I want, good or bad, it’s up to people whether they read or not. My problem is, I need to remember there is good, because all to often I focus on the bad.

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  8. I use Bloglovin not WordPress to follow blogs. I like to keep people guessing if I am watching them or not! So you really have 999 followers counting me! So you bought the dot com–nice! When you don’t know what to do with your blog, change the color or move some widgets or gadgets around. If it looks different, maybe it is! You can quote me.

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    • I used to use Bloglovin, I like it too, must see if I can dig it out, as unlike with the reader I never missed anything. Because I don’t get to sit and read often I find I miss loss of posts when trying to scroll back.
      I’d had the domain name for a while, but finally decided to map it but I totally agree, giving the blog a spruce up do help, because you can’t wait to fill the new space with words :)

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  9. this is my first time commenting. I am following and have been for a while now. I love your attitude. And your totally right. This community is great, the kindness and support from people in the wordpress mental health community is just amazing. Sending you tons of hugs, keep up the writing you are an eloquent writer! ❤ xxx

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  10. Good on you for carrying on. I changed my blog over recently, mainly due to someone accidentally finding it who I really didn’t want looking at it due to their toxic nature. It really stifled my writing, but since changing I feel a lot freer again. Like you, blogging allows me to get thoughts out instead of them whirring in my head. That can only be a good thing. Good luck with continuing your blog 🙂

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    • I have to say you did confuse me for a minute or two when I first saw your comment, then I figured it out and did wonder about the change, I do like it though.
      I have to say your first blog because it has fitness in the title would normally have appealed to me as I’m not the fittest pixie in the forest. I’d seen it on BUYB and added it anyway because I like to make sure I’m not just passing things by on names and honestly some of your posts just blew me away cos it was what I had been thinking or feeling and I loved the ease with which you explained things. So I think I prefer this new name of yours and I’m off to follow it now too because I want to keep reading.

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  11. It’s great that you are not grumbly grumbly any more Juls ! And, yay, you have a domain ! Well done ! I suppose that means I have to put up with you for many more years. lol
    Take care and blog on my friend 🙂 ❤

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    • Ah now steady on, I haven’t had a personality transplant so I’m still going to be grumbly grumbly ffs lol It takes people like me to balance out the world 😛
      I had the domain for ages, but never bothered mapping it, but now I have, not sure it makes a lot of difference to other people, but it does to me :)
      I’m glad I’ll be here too, to read about your future exciting new adventures! I need you to have enough fun for the both of us while I’m over here being all grumbly grumbly lol

      Liked by 1 person

  12. The best part of blogging i have found is that without realising it there are also so many people who are also battling their minds in the same way as you! I love your work keep it up 🙂

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