Knock Knock!

The Indecisive Eejit22 Comments

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There was this stupid game we used to play when we were younger, it was called Belfast Knock. I have no idea of it’s origins, or even if I am thinking of the right thing, but this was what it meant to us:

  • Run up to a random front door
  • Knock loudly
  • Run like f*ck!

It’s pretty easy right, and if you wanted to be very particular about the whole thing you could change the name to that of the town in which you reside.  I quite like the way Cloud Nine Knock runs off my tongue.

I remember one Halloween playing Belfast Knock whether I wanted to or not, as a failed attempt at trick or treating at the local youth hostel saw us staring down the barrel of a shotgun with the Northern Ireland version of “Ger orf my land” being bellowed. My knees knocked, there is a fair chance I left skid marks and I never went Trick or Treating ever again!

Belfast Knock is the kind of game you play up until a certain age. Once you reach your peak, you’ll slide into one of the following categories:

  • “Oh lets play something else, I can’t be bothered to run anymore.”
  • “You want me to leave my games console??”
  • “Wise up, what feckin age are you anyway”

I can assure you, this story has a point, although not a very exciting one.

There are times when the working day can seem quite long. I’d been looking at spreadsheets all afternoon and my eyes were starting to turn in and blend all the boxes into a foreign language that no one on this planet was ever going to understand. Deciding to stretch my legs I delivered some post and on the way back decided to play Belfast Knock on the door of my work mates office. His doorway is the first inside a corridor, and to get to it you have to go through a door frame.

I faced the door and prepared to knock. There were no signs of life inside, but still I rapped on the door with all my might. I stood for a minute or too thinking there was no one inside and then heard footsteps, panicked and thought, right, this is the run part, so I turned and ran straight into the other doorway almost knocking myself out in the process.

When my colleague opened the door he was a little bemused to see me standing there rubbing my arm babbling about playing Belfast Knock, and who can blame him. Next time I decide to re visit stupid games from my childhood I’m just going to slap myself and cut out all the crap in the middle!

What games did you like as a kid?

Cosmic Musicology Test: Comin at ya early!

The Indecisive Eejit1 Comment

Kg is the first one aboard the Starship Cosmic Musicology :)

KG's avatarBooks, Music, Photography, & Movies

I missed the Cosmic Musicology Test last week while I was away and was so glad to see it come a little bit early even though I still am doing it on Monday and this time from ‘The Indecisive Eejit‘.

Here are this week’s questions and my answers.

I think I am? Billionaire – Travie McCoy ft Bruno Mars

There ain’t nothin’ wrong in thinkin’ that I am a billionaire is there ;)  even though I am not even close to 0.00001% of it (how much is 0.00001% of a billion anyway ? I wonder) as long as I behave like one. On that note, what do billionaire’s  actually do ?

You think I am? Heroes – Alesso ft Love To

Oooh! OK… I can’t stop anyone from thinking I am a hero but where is mine ?

We should be? Never been in love – Cobra Starship ft…

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Cosmic Musicology Test – Comin at ya early!

The Indecisive Eejit13 Comments

Steve New Music Challenge

Woo hoo, it’s all very exciting, the Cosmic Captain himself, Steve from Steve Says, is for one week only letting me host his brilliant quiz the Cosmic Musicology Test. Why, I hear you ask yourselves, well because he can’t be bothered thinks I am brilliant is the answer. He’s set the bar high, I have to prove my worth and meet targets, so you’re more than welcome to join in any week, but especially this week to prove to him I am worth my shot in the spot light.

For anyone who has not played the challenge before, here is a refresher of the instructions:

For each test the host will post 3 new questions so…

(1) Go to the music player of your choice and put it on shuffle
(2) Say the questions aloud and press play
(3) Use the song title as your answers
(4) NO CHEATING

Title your post “Cosmic Musicology Test:…” and link back to that week’s page.

Post your response in the comment section of that week’s page.

Any suggestions for future questions welcomed! Just make sure you leave them on Steve’s page, not this one.

Take a look at all the previous weeks in the Archives or by clicking  “Cosmic Musicology” in the category cloud on Steve’s page.

If you’d like to host one in the future, get in tough with Steve and beg, he’ll give in eventually :)

On to this weeks questions and my answers:

1. I think I am? – Team by Lorde – I do think I am a team, especially here. It’s like a family and I would have nothing if it were not for my followers, many of whom have become friends. Team Eejit, I like that, you in?

2. You think I am? – Freedom by the Housemartins – Do you think I’m freedom from the housework and the chores, from the nagging voice of your boss, from the laundry and anything else that ties you up. Am I 5 minutes of putting your feet up and reading a load of oul tripe? If I am, that’s fine by me :)

3. We should be? – Ticks & Leeches by Tool – Ah ffs, there is always one isn’t there. Hmmm ok, we’re ticks because for some people we tick all the right boxes and for others not so many. Do what you do, you will never please everyone. We’re leeches because every day we learn and  suck in the knowledge of our friends and fellow bloggers and you know what, that’s fine, as long as it makes us more Ticks than Leeches!

Go on, give the quiz a try, you know you want to!!

Some days…

May Dupp12 Comments

Sometimes

Hormones, yes, lets talk about hormones. For those not in the know, they are the thing that women seem to have in abundance, but men, by their own admission have very few of, although we women would beg to differ.

Hormones are like a light switch, flipping you effortlessly between wanting to murder anyone within a 10 ft radius and wanting to cry your eyes out at pretty much anything, including adverts for toilet cleaner, wtf!?

Hormones also make us eat, forget Mr Will Power, he has no chance when going head to head with Mr Hor Mone, who pretty much trumps any one at any thing.

Thankfully I have a few years years yet before the lady hormones invade my body and seek world domination, that said, I am already prone to crying at random adverts, which can be pretty embarrassing when they are on billboards in the middle of a busy street. Worse still when you read on and realise that when they were telling her to ‘Be free’ and ‘be light’ they were talking about a fecking sanitary towel. Oh the shame!

My office however is a hive of hormonal activity, that would be a dream for any starter HRT company looking for guinea pigs. In my pod of 4 alone, there are two who are clutching with just fingernails to the brink and two (of which I am one) who are hanging on with everything they have got to the notion that they are still in their twenties.

There are very few men in our office workspace, which is probably just as well, because they would be eaten alive on any given day that ends with a Y! The few that there are tend to travel in packs and seem to have extremely good hormonometers that tell them when to steer clear. They have learnt the hard way that asking the question “Ooo is it your time of the month?” is just about the stupidest fecking question you can ask a woman who has just thrown her faulty stapler against the wall in a fit of temper  an attempt to make it work, and no before you ask, that was NOT me!

So to summarize, hormones are sneaky rotten little feckers…beware!

Cosmic Musicology Test: This or that….

The Indecisive Eejit17 Comments
Steve Says
Wow, that’s so cosmic man!

It’s wake up week for super Steve’s Cosmic Musicology Test, woohoo and this week as an additional bonus he is offering anyone who is interested a chance to host the quiz for a week. I’m all for that…note to self, remember to tell him. Please remember if you are completing the quiz you must link back to Steve’s original post, which for this week, you can find HERE! This is his quiz, not mine.

A quick reminder of the rules:

For each test Steve will post 3 new questions so…

(1) Go to the music player of your choice and put it on shuffle
(2) Say the questions aloud and press play
(3) Use the song title as your answers
(4) NO CHEATING

Title your post “Cosmic Musicology Test: …” and link back to the post for that week (as above).

Post your response in the comment section of that week’s page.

Have a look at the archives or click on “Cosmic Musicology” in the category cloud on Steve’s page to see all previous tests.

For more information, to submit ideas for future questions, to host your own or just general feedback go to Cosmic Musicology Test.

This weeks questions and my answers:

1. Beer or wine? – (Interlude 3) by Alt-J – Some people may indeed use an interlude to peel themselves off the sofa and head to the fridge for more beer or wine. Me, well I’m pretty much a non drinker, but I’ll have that bag of nibbles you have in your other hand :)

2. Sweet or Savoury? – Freedom by Paloma Faith – Oh I like this answer, doesn’t that pretty much give me carte blanche to stuff my fat little face with anything I damn well please. Sweet, savoury….ah just give me one of everything!

Chipmunk Cheeks

3. Morning or evening? – Storms in Africa by Enya – Who cares ffs, we’re talking storms in Africa, anytime would be a good time, nuff said!

If you would like to give this quiz a try for yourself, click on the ink and follow the yellow brick road, or the trail of crumbs I left behind……….

C³ – Fictional Characters

The Indecisive Eejit11 Comments

Cartoon Craziness Challenge Banner

I did it, I did it, I got my Week 9 Cartoon Craziness Challenge drawing done. I thought long and hard about what I wanted to draw, as in, there were a lot of things I gave long consideration to and then realised they were too hard to draw, said feck dat and gave up. After a few more days of chewing on the end of a pencil and listening to my brain cells debating, I got out my sketch book, grabbed a pen and sat down to let my hands take over. I drew Willy Wonka. It’s ok to say WTF, cos I did, several times!

Willy Wonka

He’s not my favourite fictional character but for some reason it was decided that he would be the character that I drew for this challenge. In my head I always imagined him to be more kindly and a little less creepy that the versions portrayed by Gene Wilder and Johnny Depp, but I am ashamed to say I have never read the book, well not that I can remember anyway, so they could have been totally accurate.

The other fictional character I did try to draw was the one and only May Dupp, but she turned out to be all mouth, which to be fair it pretty accurate, but makes for a pretty rubbish drawing. There was no way I was ever going to be able to top the amazing work already done by Bitstrips, so I let that one go.

I’ve been giving serious consideration as to what to do about this challenge and asked Mama what she thought too. Everyone seems to be so busy right now, myself included and I wouldn’t want anyone to feel pressured into having to doodle, but if there are only going to be entries from myself and Mama then there is no point in running it as a challenge. I’ll have a sleep on it and see what I think. Sometimes these things just run their course, that’s what Mama said and perhaps she is right, it has been fun.

Till next time :)

Back to reality…

The Indecisive Eejit16 Comments

Back to Work

This is kinda how I feel about going back to work tomorrow, I am a little bit traumatised to say the least. Why oh why did I ever think I was going to like the idea of going back on a Friday….seriously….WTF was I thinking!

I was rather unproductive on my three days off, well apart from one where I went to visit some friends, that actually felt like the first slice of normality I have had in a long time and cheered me up me no end.

Today was a trip to the hospital with my Dad to visit an Opthalmic surgeon, who asked me if I wanted to look through his eye machine..oo er Mrs! I did take him up on his kind offer, however I couldn’t see much, but then neither could the Fathership, hence the reason for his visit. He’s got something that is both really hard to pronounce and spell, so I am not even going to try but here’s my easier explanation as I interpreted it:

  • The fathership has an alien being in his eye.
  • It was small, but now it is growing and spreading a little red blanket across the cornea.
  • Dr Who? (no he’s not called that, I just don’t know his name) is going to blast and scrape the beastie before burning it out by the roots.
  • Mass clean of eyeball and off you go.

I either fainted or tuned out, I am not sure, but that’s the general jist of the whole thing. Sorry if your squeamish but there was no way I was suffering this shit alone.

Being back in the hospital reminded me of the whole Alien Leg saga and the countless hours I wasted waiting for appointments. The system seems to be that you are alloted a time for your appointment, but there is a three hour buffer around it. I’m not complaining though, because the service today and back then was first class as always.

It’s funny looking back now though, as I said to the Fathership today, I am never going to forget the accident because I am reminded of it every time I take a step, however it’s no longer the major trauma that it once was. It seems like it happened in another lifetime, the reality is, it was only two years ago. Eventually you have to file it under ‘Feck it’ and carry on.

The Mothership has an appointment on Monday so I am expecting a turbulent weekend as the stress starts to build, but I can always live in hope.

I still have no C³ drawing done, but then neither has anyone else so I’m not feeling too guilty and I will attempt to get it done before Sunday. I’ve had a sneak peak of Mama’s on Bakebook though and it’s looking mighty fine, I can’t wait to see the finished product.

Well that’s about it, I am totally wrecked and need some sleep, I have to be up early to sellotape the sides of my mouth up into a smile for the start of the working day!

Goodnight eejits :)

Virtual Blog Tour

The Indecisive Eejit15 Comments

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A while back KiwiBee from Snap Thoughts kindly nominated me for the Virtual Blog Tour. I’m not normally a lover of awards or of nominating others for them because as a rule they are very time consuming and once the first flush of excitement passes, quite frankly sometimes they can be a pain in the ass. The fact that people visit here and oftentimes comment is reward enough for me. I read this one though and it’s something different, so I decided to give it a try. The hardest part, as with all these awards is knowing who to nominate, because I follow so many brilliant people. My hope would be, that as we all in someway interlock with each other, this will eventually make it’s way around us all.

The three rules of this tour are as follows:

1. Compose a one-time post which is posted on Monday (date will be given to you from whoever passes on the tour)

2. Answer four questions about your creative process which lets other bloggers and visitors know what inspires you to do what you do.

  • What am I working on?
  • How does my work differ from others of its genre?
  • Why do I write/create what I do?
  • How does your writing/creating process work?

3. Pass the tour on to up to four other bloggers. Get their permission first, give them rules and a specific Monday to post.

So here goes:

What am I working on?

Right now I’m working on keeping my blogs afloat. I want to try and get back to the fun posts from before, because of late life has become quite intense and manic and somewhere in the middle of it all I lost myself.

Mental Mama from Mental in the Midwest and I also run the Cartoon Craziness Challenge, where each week people submit doodles / cartoons based around a given theme.

I have two blogs, this one and also The Misadventures of May Dupp. May is all the things that I am not, fabulous, fashionable, fiesty and confident. She is also totally fictional, which gives me another level of creativity that I don’t always have here. She also has her own Twitter account, where I can portray a level of confidence I wish I had, I mean I would never in a million years say something like this, not even in jest:

As easy as it sounds, though, assuming the identity of someone else and writing as them is harder than I thought, essentially I am a story teller, but I would have to say, not a very good one. With time I hope I can improve.

How does my work differ from others of it’s genre?

I’m not all together sure that it does. My intention would be to make people laugh, which would be the end goal for anyone who writes in that genre. Whether I succeed or not is a matter for those who read me, but I would like to think I have made each person laugh at least once. It’s hard though to be funny all the time, so seriousness has to creep in sometimes, but if a little humour can be injected into that as well, then that’s no bad thing.

Why do I write / create what I do?

I could say for others, but the truth is, it is every bit as much for me too. If I am going to be this stupid and ridiculous I might as well share it out, it would be nothing short of a crime to keep it all to myself. How will I ever know how many more eejits there are in this world of ours if I do not reach out to them. In just over a year I have found quite a few already and I love each and every one of them.

How does your writing / creating process work?

Occasionally I will take notes, but when I look back on them, they usually make no sense. Usually my process works like this:

  • I think of something.
  • I forget to write it down.
  • I’m all excited because I feel it is the best idea I have EVER had!
  • I get distracted.
  • I forget my idea.
  • I write about something completely different.
  • Repeat cycle.

I’m pretty sure I am not alone in that creative process and up until now the ‘Haphazard Method’ as it will now become affectionately known has served me quite well!

Over to you

I would like to nominate the following bloggers for a virtual blog tour on the 13th October 2014, I have not however asked their permission, because although I had this set in my calendar to give me plenty of warning to get things done, I forgot to check my calender….Doh!!

Like I said before I follow many blogs all of which are amazing in their own right, however my nominations are for people I feel are a different class of writer to me, as in I am coach, they are first, and I am genuinely interested in their thought processes:

Rob’s Surf Report

Write Up the Spine

A Prompt Reply

Jed’s Playhouse

Please also check out the blogs of the other eejits who comment here, there are many hidden gems among them you have yet to discover.

Thank you KiwiBee for your nomination, I actually enjoyed writing this post, but don’t tell anyone in case I get more nominations :)

Half asleep!

The Indecisive Eejit8 Comments

Sleep - IE

The lie in didn’t go so good, if you could see me now, eyes hanging out of my head and hair like I have been dragged through a bush backwards, you would instantly know, there was no lie in! Normally its either the next door neighbours hens clucking and clacking as they try to squeeze an egg out of their arse, or the dog telling them to get the feck up it needs off it’s leash. This morning it was the fathership who was the traitor and decided to mow the lawn at just after 9 in the morning. Seriously old man, have you nothing better to do, like helping the next door neighbours menagerie sort their shit out. Serves me right for going to bed at stupid o’clock anyway!

I’ve been thinking a lot about my blogs recently. It’s funny, but I liked the idea of the May Dupp one because she was a fictional charter, which gave me the freedom to write whatever I wished. I never thought, at the time, that it would be like writing stories, you still have to think of a beginning, a middle and an end. I thought I would (in my head) assume the character of May and it would all come naturally. I’m still enjoying the challenge tho and intend to keep her going for as long as I can.

Yesterday however, in a fit of madness I started a Twitter account for her. Now I have to say I am not the best at Twitter, but I like the idea of being her and causing some havoc, it will probably give me the balls to comment on things I normally never would have, and the fact that she is fictional gives me the freedom of free speech, within reason of course. I intend to have a little fun with her, so follow at your own risk and prepare for cheekiness and naughtiness. To connect with her follow @maydupp.

Sometime over the coming week I hope to get my drawings done for the Cartoon Craziness Challenge. I have a few ideas, and it will be interesting to see if I can transfer them onto paper, they are either going to make you laugh or cry. The most current version of the challenge is C³ – Week Nine. I know I have not updated the main page ^ there yet, but I will at some stage over this weekend.

Ok time to get moving, there is housework to be done and I have decided that for lunch I am going to have a bowl of ice cream, chocolate sauce, toasted almonds and flake! I am on my holidays after all, even if it is just for a few days.

Done and dusted!

The Indecisive Eejit6 Comments

I have never been as glad to see the end of two working days in all my life. Manic is does not even come close to describing what it has been like. I hardly had enough energy left to take my laptop out of it’s case and set it up for my journey home on the train.

Going off on leave is stressful, the art of calmly clearing up all the odds and sods that need done before leaving is clearly something I have not yet mastered. I’m more of a run around in a flap, but eventually get there kind of person. I pity anyone who reads the last few e-mails I sent, I doubt they were legible. But I made it, and as a reward I do not have to think about work again until Friday….oh happy days!!

I am sure there are things I have not done, that will come to me in the middle of the night and wake me from peaceful slumber. I have already e-mailed myself with things that I need to remember and can think of a few more that I need to send myself when I get home.

This Personal Secretary lark is easy….SAID NO ONE EVER!!

I could see through it if I was able to go home and relax, but there is still shopping to be done and dinner to prepare and goodness knows what form the Mothership will be in considering I have deviated from the normal routine. The great unknown lies ahead.

I really want this weekend to be incident free, no let me rephrase that, I really need this weekend to be incident free. The last two have been mentally draining and I am in dire need of some rest and relaxation, excluding the housework and cooking duties that is, some things never change.

So what lies ahead? I could promise you that I am going to do all my drawings for the Cartoon Craziness Challenge and regale you every day with funny stories that will have you falling off your chairs with laughter. I could also tell you that May Dupp is going to partake of her usual weekend antics leaving a trail of destruction in her wake.

I could promise all of that, but I won’t, because I’m going to shop, eat, clean up, perhaps kill a few things on the Xbox and then go to bed and sleep. After that there might be a little more sleep, and then some sleeping thrown in for good measure.

What happens after that is anyone’s guess!!

Happy Friday my most favourite eejits!