Perhaps I didn’t think this challenge through before I issued it. I mean did I seriously think I was going to be able to narrow all the things I would change about myself down to just one, who was I trying to kid!
Throughout my life there have always been things I wanted to change, sometimes even my life itself. I wonder how many of us can say with all honesty that we are living the life we always thought we would. Certainly not me, some of that is my fault and some is down to circumstance, not all things are within our control. In order to change, you need to have the time and means to do so.
There are things I wish I had done, things I wish I could do, and perhaps some things I will still yet manage before my time is up. When I sit and consider everything, all paths lead to the door of confidence, which where I am concerned is firmly shut.
Confidence, or lack of is not like a bruise, it is not an affliction you can see, as such, you might be surprised by the number of people it can affect. I know I have shocked people with my admission, because apparently I appear much more confident than I actually am.
Most everything in life takes a dash of confidence to accomplish, even the most simple thing like walking into a room full of strangers.What can be exhilarating for some, can be crippling for others.
I hate second guessing myself, but it has almost become part of my daily routine. I will eventually make a decision, however I will waste time both before and afterwards fretting the outcome. Lately this has proved detrimental to both my work and my mental health. My perceived failure in my current job is shattering the small shards of confidence I had. I am not stupid, I know that I am my own worst critic, but no matter how many people tell me I am doing just fine, I do not feel like I am. I need to learn to give myself a break, I can only do what I can do.
That said, who would have thought that during this post I would show a little confidence and narrow down my choices after all, either that or I am being super smart and have more posts planned, this theme for me could be endless.