It’s Saturday afternoon and Billy and Seamus are sitting at the kitchen table drinking a cup of tea whilst keeping on eye on the football:
Billy: Did you ever in yer life hear so much fuss about fecking Batman.
Seamus: You mean about the fact thon fella from Daredevil is playing him?
Billy: Aye, the Bat Geeks are not a happy bunch just now.
Seamus: What do you think our names would be if we were super heroes?
Billy: (Laughing) Well you’d definitely be Twatman.
Seamus: Oh ha ha ya fecking genius, when I cuff you one round the lugs you’ll be Throbin!!
Craic – (Pronounced crack) Means great fun, good banter, a good laugh. i.e. “We were at the pub last night and the craic was mighty!”
So for anyone that didn’t know, the World Police and Fire Games were held in Northern Ireland this year.
It was a strange sight to see police officers dandering about without a care in the world, their occupation blazoned across their backs. Well it was certainly strange for here anyway, given our unusual situation.
According to the news reports a good time was had by all, people loved our little country, some even electing to stay a little longer and sightsee when the hype was over and the games had finished.
Being a constant worrier I don’t watch the news much, but one night I happened to catch a snippet of a report about a married couple, who were FBI and had travelled over for the games. The reporter when finishing the interview advised them to visit some of the local pubs and enjoy the craic. I’m not sure the gentleman understood what she was meaning, but he laughed and said he would indeed.
Fast forward a week and the same gentleman is being interviewed after completing his event and saying how much both he and his wife were enjoying the trip, so the reporter asks, and this is not word for word cos I have the memory of a Goldfish, “Did you manage to find any craic?”, to which the gentleman replied, “I’m not sure I would want my bosses to hear me saying on television that I enjoyed craic whilst I was in Northern Ireland.”
Oh how I laughed! Good on ye sir! Would be especially embarrassing if you worked for the DEA!
In an attempt to increase his skills and get Seamus back into work, the dole office send him on a one day work experience to an office supplies company.
Later in the pub the lads are discussing the days events.
Billy: Well Seamus how did you get on the day then?
Seamus: Aye, no to bad, the craic was mighty. The boss was a bit of an eejit tho.
Billy: How so?
Seamus: Well, here be’s me to the boss, where do you want this 6 metre roll of bubble wrap.
Seamus: ‘An he says pop it over there in the corner. It took me four feckin hours!!
NB: Many thanks to Fiona McK who texted me this gem last night, I had to pad it out a little but the punchline had me literally laughing my ass off! She gets the credit for this one :)