As you get older – The Indecisive Eejit

As you get older, technology seems to move faster and become more difficult. Couple that with the slight memory failure that seems to start once you hit forty and things are on a downward spiral.

Saving telephone numbers into your mobile phone should be a simple enough task, unless like me you are easily confused. I have this quirk about not having two people of the same name in my phone, it always leads to me sending the right message to the wrong person. To avoid this, one person will have their proper name and the other will have a nickname. Problem solved…….or not!

One of my friends has been off for a couple of weeks now after having a minor op. To abbreviate and to save anyone any embarrassment, lets just say a horticulturist was visiting the general area her lady garden.

It’s been a busy couple of weeks in the office what with the girls being off, and tonight I finally remembered to text my friend and ask her how she was doing. In an attempt to make her laugh I sent the following message, “Hey Tootise, how’s your toush, hope you are well.” I was rather pleased with my wit.

I saw her come online and read the message, but then go offline again without sending a reply. That’s weird I think, saying hmmmm repeatedly and scratching my head, that was bound to make her laugh. I checked again, no reply, and then it dawned on me, I had sent the message to the wrong person. Both friends have the same name, but one was in my phone as a nickname!

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I hastily sent an explanation text and another to my other friend telling her about my faux pas, thankfully I have understanding friends!

I’ve been laughing at myself ever since!

(Nicola if you read this, you will know to whom I am referring!)

As You get Older

When you’re young, don’t know any better and in fact couldn’t care less about the effects that both age and gravity are going to have on your body, you do the Baywatch run.

You imagine you look like Pamela Anderson. Everything goes in slow motion, as you gracefully sprint from A to B all tanned and goddess like, smiling at your adoring fans with your pearly white teeth.

As you get older, you do the Mummy run, regardless of whether you are actually a mother or not.

You imagine everyone is looking at you, but nit for the right reasons. You can’t get from A to B fast enough and you need to have the arms of an octopus to hold down all the bits of your body that used to be pert and gravity defying. All this and trying to hang on to your handbag as well, not an easy task!

My work colleague (mother) and I (not a mother) discussed this the other night on the way home and almost wet ourselves laughing, another side effect as we get older!